GMS week 7

Good day Family and Friends,

We shall begin with recent events and then move into what God has been doing in my life.

First Dave is GONE! Ah the humanity! His side of the room lies barren and I am left alone. I am not actually that emotionally effected, but I am definitely bummed out. Just as we were starting to grow closer is was ripped away from me by the air force and sent to turkey. I praise God for the time that we did have together though and am encouraged by what I have seen God do in his life over the summer.

What has God been doing this week? Hmmm...
It seems as though every week God brings to the fore front something different every time. This weeks focus was brought upon truly finding my identity in Christ, truly loving the world, non-christians whom I interact with, and my Christian friends as well.

Identity in Christ - Not a works based salvation
Over the past week God has been speaking a lot of truth into my life regarding this subject. In fact the focus for this week's study was "Identity in Christ" which was and has been so clutch when looking back at the state I was in over the weekend. I was able to get some time with our speaker this week and he was also able to tell me a lot of truth. He mostly talked and advised us on listening prayer(1).
Lie from Satan - God will only provide me with salvation and look well upon me if I act strictly according to his law. That I can never rest, that if I am resting I am using my time unwisely and not for the Lord.
1st Truth from God - Regarding a works based salvation.
Galatians 4:1-2 "What I am saying is that as long as the heir is a child, he is no different from a slave, although he owns the whole estate. 2He is subject to guardians and trustees until the time set by his father." If you want to understand more you should probably read this verse in context. For me this verse opened my eyes of my heart to the fact that it was God set the time for me to receive the full rights of being his adopted son. Before this I had the same rights as a slave. God brought me out of slavery and accepted me as his adopted son, I did nothing, could do nothing. My role was to be a slave and in such a role I could make no decision contrary to what I was instructed to do, my instructor was the sinful nature (Ephesians 2:1-3).
2nd Truth from God - Regarding rest.
Hebrews 4:9 "There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God;" I am able to rest at times but others I feel like I should be doing something, this is definitely still a work in progress.

In both of these truths I have not even come close to fully grasping them and living them out in my life. I am continually being molded and shaped by God. That being said I have gained a greater heart knowledge of both of them over the past week.

Loving the World and fellow Christians well -
God has been bring to my attention that I continue to love those around me poorly, especially those of the world. I am uncertain how I can directly influence whom I love and to what extent that love will be poured out. My only thoughts have been to look to Christ and his character and to pray continually for a greater love of those around me. One reason I desire a greater love for non-Christians is to portray Christ in me to them, hopefully giving them a desire for Christ as well. A reason for why I desire to form a greater love for my fellow believers in Christ is because of John 13:34,35
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."
By showing my love to this coworker I am loving as Christ loved and therefore revealing Christ's character to those who do not believe.

The end is near and I am sure that it will come much quicker than expected. This week as already blazed by. I am excited to return home but I will be saddened when I leave all of these people whom I have developed a strong connection with and deep love for.

Prayer
- Satan continues to attack my mind with worries about money. Pray that I will be able to give this up to God and trust him with it.
- That my mind will stay here in Vermont, while I am here, and not dwell on things to come in Arizona.
- A loving spirit
- I have not been sleeping well. There is a lot of unrest while I am trying to go to bed. Pray that God would expose the reason and begin working upon it.
- Pray for the hearts and minds of the non-Christians I work with, that a great vacuum would be created within that would give them a desire to know the one true God.
- Pray for my one Christian co-worker. She is feeling worn down after 2 years of working just with non-Christians. She feels as though she is always losing. Pray that she would be encouraged.

Thanks
- Jon


(1) Listening Prayer - The act of praying to God and then to sitting in silence, regardless of how awkward it may be, and wait for him to respond to you. (Has been very beneficial every time I have done it.)

GMS week 6

Hey Guys,

God has placed me in an interesting predicament, but once that is necessary for me to continue on in my sanctification process. God has shown me that I do not fully believe that Ephesians 2:8-9 is true.

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast."

Being raised in the church that I was raised in, the ICC, I have developed a highly works based salvation. I was in this church up until the age of 13.

Brief synopsis on the ICC (International Churches of Christ) - A cultic "church" organization where there was no grace and all of your salvation was based upon how much you did, how many people you evangelized to, how much money you tithed, etc. There is obviously more to be said but I believe this description will suffice. Dad, if I have misspoken please alert me to my error.

It is only lately that I have been shown that I have been really living in this fashion. I have been shown that I have never, at least consciously, required God's grace to be laid upon me. I have always been able to sufficiently avoid sin. I have taught myself all the correct biblical things to do. Pray, give glory to God, encourage and love others, the list of Gods commands goes on. But the truth is this:

Isaiah 64:6
All of us have become like one who is unclean,
and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags;
we all shrivel up like a leaf,
and like the wind our sins sweep us away.

These righteous acts mean nothing, they are actually less than that. The words "filthy rags" actually translate for rags used for womens mensuration cycles. My apologies for the graphicness, but it is in that imagine that I believe I am able to gain a glimpse of how God views my actions.

I am therefore in a strange positions because in everything I DO I earn my own salvation, the way I read the bible, the way I socialize, even the way I pray. So I can DO nothing in order to change my view of my "good works." Not saying that the things that I do are bad in and of them selves but the backing for these actions is flawed. God must do this for me. He must change my heart.

Overview of the week:
Currently in Boston, don't think I could ever live inside of a big city. Just watched the redsocks dominated the orioles at fenway park. This was unfortunate for my roommate because the orioles are his favorite team. The past weeks thoughts have mostly been consumed by the contents of this email, besides that nothing to exciting except I worked everyday last week. I hope I will have a day off this week so I can get some good time with God. my roommate takes off for Turkey on Thursday. This is a big bummer to have him gone for the last 2 weeks of the program.

Prayer:
- God to be doing business upon my heart and change it in the way he needs to.
- I will be filled with God's joy despite what is going on in my life. (That Philippians 4:4 will be true)
- To find another male confidant for the last two weeks because of my room mates absence.
- That this will not be a mountain top experience.
- I would be able to love others despite my rather internal mood.
- I would be able to share the gospel with my co-worker before I leave.

Thanks
Jon

PS My apologies for length and possible negative attitude with in this email. I am currently in the thick of what I foresee to be a large change in the way I do business, but this time is hard.

Week 5 (woof its already halfway done)

Good day guys,

God has been doing so much business over the past 5 weeks. Some of it has been made known to me while a large majority of it has been done underneath the surface. I am in a state and praise and thankfulness to God. He has increased my view of him and his power immensely.

My time at TJMAXX has been good and bad, but most times it has left me with an immense joy because of what God has done in my life. I am all alone in a back room by myself for about 7 hours whenever I work there. These times have led to excellent stretches of thinking and verse memorization. I listen to a sweet sermon by John Piper a couple of weeks ago titles “The Danger of Drifting from the Word.” It in he talks about God giving us a simple command from Hebrews 2 to just simply “listen or look” to Jesus. It has been awesome to live this out and see how many other things in my life have fallen into place as a result. The simplicity of it all continues to blow my mind.

During these times my thoughts have started drifting towards the up and coming semester. I am really excited about it. It is going to be really hard but really good. I am excited to finally honor God with my studies. In the past I have viewed them as “unspiritual” or as something that doesn’t have any worth in “God’s country.” FALSE! This is one of the biggest areas in my life to worship God.

I am also really excited to lead a bible study with my really good friend Andy. The ideas are racing on what can be done to benefit these freshman men in their spiritual walk with God. Prayers concerning this would be that the bible study would be unified and that during this first year they would develop a deep love for the word. That the focus would not be on Andy and myself but that we would be able to get out of the way and that their focus would only be on God.

Update concerning the girl I work with: She did not come to the barbeque unfortunately but I am still hopeful for further interactions at work. I have yet so speak to her again but I work tomorrow morning so hopefully she will be working.

I have yet to have a solid talk with the guy on my team. I am also unsure where the spirit is leading on that who situation. Prayer for wisdom on whether I should initiate at all. I already have many relationships to invest in while I am here. Does God desire me to invest in this one as well?

Prayer

- God would continue to provide opportunities to portray Christ to my coworkers, and by his grace and to my joy share the gospel with them.

- For continued team unity.

- For the girl at my work and my coworkers in general.

- Safe travels this weekend. ( I am going to visit some Aunt and Uncles this weekend in New York whom I havn’t seen for 2 years)

Thanks for praying guys, Glory and Honor be to God.

Jon

Week 4

Good Day,

This continues to be a an experience that I am sure will have repercussions throughout the rest of my life. God has opened my eyes to many things: views on life, sin, evangelism, etc. Here is a brief, but more specific synopsis of the items that God has been bringing to my attention during my time here.

1) The Spirit that Jesus talks about in John 14 is alive and well in my own life. I have been able to view its guidance in my own life much more effectively in the past and therefore I have been able to visibly give God more glory.
2) A better definition of what worshiping and glorifying God looks like has been given to me. Time spent in the word and visibly worshiping God, singing songs etc., are not the only ways to glorify God with my life. That in fact my "work in this world is my greatest form of worship" (possibly quoted from John Piper). This has brought me to the conclusion that living out a life in ministry is NOT the only option for properly devoting my life to God.
3) Evangelism is a life style and does not always entail directly delivering the gospel to everyone you come in contact with. Not to say that delivering the gospel is not essential, but evangelism is more relational than I previously made it out to be. Simply and in part it is showing love for one another. John 13:35 "By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."
4) My pride is a monster that continuously steals glory from God. If I have anger toward it even in that I sin against God by not accepting God's grace and making it all about me. I need to be consistently looking towards God's glory and comparing myself to him. In that my hope is to be overwhelmed by his glory as Isaiah was in Isaiah 6 and be humbled.
5) I suck at loving those whose personality I do not appreciate. They are God's creation and are a portion of the body. 1 Corinthians 12:21The eye cannot say to the hand, "I don't need you!"
My desire is to initiate towards these people regardless of the desires of my sinful nature.

Things with the team and program continue to go well. There is one member of our team who has become sort of excluded from the group. This is most likely due to the fact that he is not rooming with anyone on our team and is an introvert. Pray that we would be intentional around him and desire a relationship with him. He is a solid an of God who has a large amount of bible knowledge which adds greatly to out bible studies.

I had a sweet interaction with one of my coworkers from Starbucks. She was raised Catholic, she was disillusioned with Christ during that time, and knew that I was a Christian so she started asking questions. I believe that she has a real desire to know the truth about Christ. We are having a BBQ this Friday where we were encouraged to invite friends from work and I invited her. Pray that John 13:35 would be made visible to her if she comes. Pray that she will come. Pray for me to have wisdom on whether or not to have her invite her boyfriend.

I could write so much more but my time has expired. Thanks for praying.

-Jon

A Second Job is provided! Praise God!

Good Day,

I was out on my search for jobs walking throughout downtown Burlington in an attempt to find a secondary job which could compliment my job at Starbucks, which will only be able to provide 15-20 hrs a week. It was hot and sweaty and it seemed as though all of my options for a job had been exhausted. All I could recall was all the stories from fellow GMS'ers whom God had miraculously provided jobs through "random" circumstance." I longed for such an experience.
He provided me with one. Just the events were not as close together. I applied to TJMAX last monday and talked to a guy who said he had one maybe 2 spots to fill. I called back a few days later and talked to someone else and this guy said that they didn't have any positions available. Basically saying that I was hosed. Despite this fact in the middle of my desperate trek through downtown the guy I initially talked to gave me a call saying I could have the job. I start this upcoming monday. I will be working with womens shoes in some capacity, but I am unsure of the specifics as of now.
Lesson I cam away with from God: He is always working to give himself the glory. If I had a solid job right at the beginning I would not have given God the glory, but now it is most obviously due him. I need to be continually trusting him. I need to have the attitude of a child who is always trusting his parents with his safety. Trusting them that going down a slide is safe despite the child not knowing what is at the bottom of the slide.

Prayer List
- For those who do not have jobs. It can be rather depressing to be consistently turned down. Pray for their emotional health and for them to get jobs as well.
- Praise God for me getting a job.

-Jon

The Search Continues

When it came to getting a job I never knew that it felt like to be denied in such succession. God has certainly showed me what it feels like. It has been quite the humbling and hard experience. I do not fail often so this is a new experience for me and has created quite the struggle in my own life and has caused me to form an even greater dependence upon God. I was feeling pretty down because of it but my time with God really encouraged me this morning.

I have been going through Acts and I am finally coming near its end. I was reading through chapter 27 this morning. Paul was given an explicit promise from God stating "Do not be afraid, Paul. You must stand trial before Caesar; and God has graciously given you the lives of all who sail with you." You can read Chapter 27 yourself if you would like more back story but basically this statement means that God promised Paul that he and the men with him would survive this storm and make it Rome. In spite of this promise God did not make their journey to Rome easy, he put up road blocks and struggles for Paul and the men with him. These struggles are stated explicitly in verses 7-9 and 14-15.

To me these verses meant that though I have not received an explicit promise of a job I have received a promise for God to be working me towards my good. (Romans 8:28) Which is my promised destination. Regardless of what I may desire or what I may want God is doing what is best for my eternal life and I need to trust in that. Has that fully happened yet, no, but it is a process and will be an on going process for the rest of my life.

Other than the job search everything is awesome. I feel like I have known pretty much everyone here for years already though it has only been a week. We had our first bible study last night and it was awesome. We were going through John 15:1-11. That verse is jam packed, check it out. It was sweet just to get solid time with my group. Those times will be cherished above all others when the summer is looked back upon.

There are people hanging out downstairs and there is also a Jazz Festival downtown I might check out later.

We will be working with Burlington Street ministries tonight. Basically just meeting people on the street and just forming relationships. Not necessarily going straight to sharing the Gospel.

Prayer List
- Continue to pray for a job for others as well as myself. ( Other people still need jobs and are feeling the effects of not having one as well)
- That we would be able to truely love the people downtown that we are interacting with
-For my team: Dennis(team leader), Phil, Brian, Dave(room mate)


Jon

The job search

Good Day,

So apparently the Starbucks that I planned on working at is already overstaffed and will not be able to take me on for the summer. That is a pretty big bummer for me. I have been making attempts at other Starbucks around town but have been unsuccessful so far, well at least with getting a solid position. My current hope is to just work at least once a week at one of them to maintain my position in the starbucks system and then work somewhere else for the summer.

Just be praying that I will be able to find a job quickly.

Thanks Jon